Scandal 509: Baby It's Cold Outside Thoughts

*Today I'm just going to write. Idk if this will follow any structure & it probably won't look like my other posts. Just go with me.*

Shonda to the Scandal fandom:

Beloved, I woke up with a heavy heart this morning, and not necessarily for the reasons you may think.
This episode was BRILLIANT! Know why? Because everything that happened was authentic and organic. This had to happen. I didn't see it coming but in hindsight, it had to happen. I've always believed deep in my heart that Olitz would never work while Fitz was still in office, especially not when those two individuals have not fully healed from their past. But they tried and I was with it b/c that's what they wanted. But get this: they both came to the conclusion that it doesn't work! How powerful is that? This was the first time they were both on the same page about their relationship in 5 SEASONS. To that, I say

Olivia has always been the one tethered to the ground of reality while Fitz lived flyboy dreams...so for them to reach a common understanding is groundbreaking. In fact, this is probably more so the beginning of Olitz's relationship than anything I've ever seen on the show before!

My mother taught me never to refer to my significant other as my "other half". In a relationship, there must be two whole people that come together as one...not two half people because that = broken. That's what Olivia was talking about in 501. She knew her behind was still broken. & she knew Fitz still had stuff to deal with as well. Olivia may not know healthy relationships, but on this concept she is clear: they cannot come out together when they're broken going in. So Olitz has some healing to do. If you thought season 4 was healing, it wasn't...it was just sweeping ish under the rug. They both as individuals need to confront head on themselves, the people & things in their lives that hold them back. And they need to get to know one another as real people. They both carried an unrealistic idea of each other and it led to their [temporary] demise.

I love this season so much b/c as I've said before, the characters seem incredibly human. I can relate to most of them in a way that I couldn't in previous seasons. These characters were presented to us as invincible, power-loving beasts who didn't have time for feelings b/c they're too busy running D.C./the world. But they going through some real, every day people ish this season and I. AM. HERE. FOR. IT.

I whole-heartedly believe that you should be with the person you love. I get that in life, sometimes that doesn't happen. Call me a romantic, but I don't see that being Olivia & Fitz's story. They just can't be together right now. I don't believe they can love someone else the way they love each other. & even if they tried, it will fail b/c being in another relationship is not the solution (see: Jake, Russell & even Mellie). Know why? b/c they're not whole people! So all uh youz suggesting that Fitz date someone else to spite Olivia are not quite visualizing whole picture. You should want your guy/girl to be whole him/herself & deal w/ him/herself before even thinking about a relationship. If you gon be on this ship, whether you're #TeamFitz or #TeamOlivia, stay on the ship. Don't abandon just b/c the waters get rocky & you're seasick. Or you can jump ship, that's just more Knockout Punch for me.

Let me talk about myself right quick. Truth moment.
I've never been in a relationship before. It's not that there haven't been guys interested but ultimately, I don't think I'm ready...no matter how much I want to be in love & be cutesy wootsy with someone. I'm clear there are some things I need to work on myself before I take on the responsibility of a being with another person. I want to have a successful acting career, I want to be a be able to fully take care of myself, I want to improve my listening skills, among other things. And I don't want to bring a half a**ed shell of a person to a relationship. It's not fair to the other person & it's not fair to me. That's the place I think Olivia is in. & she communicated that to Fitz in 501 but because she was in love, she was willing to try. You can't fault them for trying. Olivia had been throwing subtle hints at Fitz all season long (like a true woman would) & Fitz (like the true man he is) let it all fly right over his head. When she said things like "Wait 18 months" and "We're not ready" and even that Proposal From the Pits of Hell, Fitz shoulda taken a step back and assessed the situation. Sat her down & had a chit chat. But no one watches Scandal for that Being Mary Jane type debate/confrontation/conversation. No shade. So that wasn't gonna happen...not yet at least. But you know what, this reminds me of when Mellie was going through the fire after her rape and he couldn't see what was really going with her internally.  I'm convinced Fitzgerald be Ray Charles to women's issues. I think the ice officially cracked when Fitz moved her in b/c Liv realized she wasn't being seen or heard. She tried some more to make everything work out even after the fact but things finally came to a head & she had to make it plain for him. Because a lot of times, Fitz can be a simpleton. I don't think the end of this episode negates everything she confessed to him about their love this season. It's just the move-in became too stifling & she couldn't breathe. It was the last straw. She couldn't be the independent woman who happened to be in love w/ the POTUS. She became ornamental. That's not who Olivia Pope is, beloved.

Ladies, don't be subliminal w/ these niggas. Tell them what it is from jump. Learn from Olivia Pope's situation. It'll save you a lot of heartbreak.

I'm gonna try & move on but I'll know I'll end up right back on Olitz. lol

Liv as FLOTUS?

I was so disgusted. It was left field. The wig was trash, though styled beautifully. The dresses were gorgeous but wrong on Olivia...it was just wrong. My heart broke for Olivia in this role. She tried it, even though she & everybody and their mama (except Fitz) knew that it wasn't going to work. No matter how much Olivia coulda shifted the role of FLOTUS in her favor. Everybody could see that being in the WH = prison for her. I especially felt bad when she thought she was finally gonna get some play fixing the senator's wife's problem when all she wanted to know was the recipe to a cookie. A DAMB COOKIE! A snickerdoodle.

Mellie's filibuster was AMAZING. Mellie didn't stand there just b/c she had all the time in the world now that she didn't have a husband to go home to or Christmas trees to decorate but because she finally got something real to stand up for! This was all she was asking for her entire tenure in the WH when it all fell on death ears. she was being functional, not ornamental. It was an absolute delight to behold.

The things she listed that weren't discretionary were ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS. Senate hair care? Something about urinals. It was abismal. & I'm so proud of Mellie for standing up for a basic human right. Outstanding.

Here's where my heart breaks: Olivia did everything in her power to make sure that Mellie succeeds in her filibuster (bringing in my girl Susan Ross who is the most hilarious person ever) because she needed that basic human right.

Look at these two women working together to make the world a better place for not only themselves but for all women in the US and ultimately the world. When Mellie was getting ready to give up, Liv needed her to keep going for her sake. How poignant? Like, I'm fighting back tears right now. This is the literal struggle & fight women endure! Liv fought for Mellie & Mellie fought for Liv I mean, my God, just think about how incredible that is!?

Let's talk about Liv's abortion.
My heart broke. I can't say that enough. Let me be clear on my stance. I am 98% sure that if I were to become pregnant out of wedlock, that I would keep the baby. There is probably only one situation in which I would strongly consider aborting...I won't name it here but I'm sure you all can figure it out. I don't like abortion. I am pro-life for myself. That is a choice I made for myself. I don't have the right to make that choice for other people.

So. Olivia decided to abort her baby by Fitz. This is a woman who didn't know how to change a diaper in the pilot. I mean, look at how she holds baby Teddy here:

Fitz was the only one verbalizing baby dreams. Olivia never did. The fact that their current situation wasn't ideal for her, was even more reason for her to make the choice she did. Sometimes we women gotta be selfish and think about ourselves & our best interests, especially when we're not married. So no, I'm not mad at her for her choice. Heartbroken, yes. But angry? no. (although I was last night. Since then I've had time to let it sit...also, the way I feel about it is subject to change over time)

Do I think Olivia would compromise on this stance of babies in the future? Possibly. I don't know. I'm led to believe this because she really did meet Fitz in the middle w/ a lot of issues this season. She accepted his bullshhh proposal, she went along w/ the FLOTUS thing...all of which were temporary & obviously reversible...but it showed what she'd be willing to do for the man she loves. But their goals and dreams need to be COMMUNICATED to each other.

I absolutely hate the fact that Olivia had to go through this alone. Nobody was there to hold her hand. But that was her choice. & clearly she's okay with that in the end. But still. I wish I woulda known so I could've been there for her. I would've figured out a way.

The Olitz argument
WAS THEE BEST ARGUMENT THEY EVER HAD. It was the realest, rawest, most honest confrontation they ever had. Ever. They both spoke truthfully from their experiences of each other in a way they never have before. I am grateful that Fitz called out the fact that Liv was running b/c had he not, she wouldn't have said anything.  Olivia brought up all of her concerns: being imprisoned & punished...but the part I loved the best was when she said I AM A BIG DOG. YES YES YES. She ain't a housewife. & the fact that Fitz couldn't see that in her is alarming. They really don't know each other & that's kinda a big deal in a relationship. When they're living in a "stolen moments" world, their knowledge of each other as it comes to being a partner in a relationship is extremely limited. The real world requires that information. Liv learned that Fitz is a needy attention seeker & Fitz learned that Liv is a boss a** b*tch 24/7...she likes to wear the pants in the relationship literally & figuratively. Liv needs to decide if she wants to be somebody's wife...somebody's "everything". Fitz needs to decide if he wants to be w/ a woman who's not going to pay attention to his every need. They had to pull apart to see each other fully. They gotta accept each other for who they are and decide what within them needs to be changed to suit the other. This will take time. They got this glimpse of each other & now I'm excited to see what decisions will be made the next half of the season.

She didn't talk to Fitz about the abortion. This is huge & will come out. I'm excited for when it does b/c that'll be another real, raw conversation. HONEST COMMUNICATION. They gon be mad at each other, but it's part of the growing pains of a relationship. This breakup will lead to some COMMUNICATION. say it with me folks, COMMUNICATION. & I'm so happy about it. It's so needed.

In the end, Olivia seemed content w/ her decisions. At the end of the day, I want my girl to be happy.

Olitz can't be together & happy right now. I don't care what you say. It's not authentic to where they are in their lives right now. Or, I should say, Fitz would be happy & Liv would be miserable. That's not cool at all. It's not fair. But are they over? Absolutely not. Also, I believe Shonda is stretching out the story, if not for anybody else, for my sake. Because I love seeing Kerry Washington & Co. on my TV. I don't want them to go anytime soon. I want to watch more episodes of Scandal. So do what you gotta do, Shonda. As long as it makes sense. This episode, as gut-wrenching as it was, made sense.

I still love Scandal. I still love Olitz. I love Shonda too. I still have hope. Everything is gonna be alright, guys.

-Candyce